When a loved one is diagnosed with a terminal illness, it is scary and overwhelming. Having a to-do list can feel empowering and keep you occupied and proactive. There are three major things you can do right away to help your newly diagnosed loved one. When you accomplish these tasks, you can then focus on the work of being there for your loved one in their final months.

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1. Incapacity Plan

The first thing you will want to do is make sure that your loved one has a plan for incapacity. You will want to know what the plan is for who will make healthcare decisions and what those decisions should be. You will want to know who will make financial decisions. You will also want to make sure that these decisions are legally documented, that the people named know what the plan is, and that everyone knows where to find the paperwork they will need to step into their roles when called upon.

2. End-of-Life Care Plan

Next, you will want to find out what your loved one’s end-of-life care wishes are, and how their care will be paid for. You will want to learn whether they wish to remain at home, receive hospice care, or move to a particular facility. You will want to know how to pay for the high costs of care. Be aware that family care comes with a lot of burnout, so talk to people who have been through it, so you can learn about any pitfalls and whether it is the right choice for your loved one. You will want to know the plan for how to pay for private care. If there are not funds to pay for full-time care (care can be $5K-15K per month), your loved one will need to visit an elder law lawyer to find out how to qualify for Medicaid.

3. Death Plan

Last, you will want to make sure that your loved on has a plan for dealing with any assets after they die. This is not the time to seek out do-it-yourself opportunities. Work with lawyer to make sure that you have a foolproof plan and that you understand exactly how that plan will work. I recently had a colleague tell me a horrific story about their client who helped his parent to create and estate plan with a do-it-yourself website and then ended up paying $50K to fix it later on. Work with a professional.

If you want to get started on your estate plan, read about our estate planning services and schedule an appointment.

To your family's health + happiness.

~Candice N. Aiston

P.S. Want to get started slowly but surely, naming guardians for your kids? Check out our Guardian Plan kit.

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Candice N. Aiston is an Legal Planning Attorney for Estates + Businesses in the Portland, Oregon area. She helps people to prepare for a lifetime of security, prosperity, and guidance. If you would like to receive her free reports, please visit http://aistonlaw.com/ to sign up. Follow her Facebook page for daily planning tips: https://www.facebook.com/aistonlaw/.